Real detox happening

Pretty much completely free of cooked and processed now. No more rice milk. Very few oats with my fruits in the mornings, which I've been having with diluted apple juice. Lunch, often salad stuff, mixed with fruits. Evening, fruits, or fruit smoothie. Nuts also at times throughout the day, but nuts don't seem good on the guts. In some ways, feel the same about salad, which is inconvenient; it's harsher than fruits somehow.

Sometimes I feel like I'm just inventing this whole thing up, this food refinement process I'm on, and doubt creeps into my mind. I even think to myself, I'm going to have cooked food again, but something in me really resists it. I'm really surprised.

So anyway, as a result of even more refinement, I've been having lots of headaches, furry teeth, always feel thirsty. Feeling thirsty is a bit strange, as I have so many fruits. But these detox symptoms are real, so when I doubt this whole thing, the mere fact that my body is getting rid of rubbish, lets me know that this is ok - I'm not going crazy. This path is worthwhile. Have been having sudden colds, that go again quickly.

Also, my weight has dipped a bit. I've noticed that my weight dips when there's stuff being thrown out.  I hope it goes up again, as I'm looking really skinny now, and am tiring of people's observations and comments.

Fitness is really good though - running, muscle work etc., no problems. Mentally feel more focused and less worried about stuff in general, but overall, I can feel this incredible resistance within me at what's going on. Even though there are people out there who have walked this path, at the end of the day, it only helps a little bit. Being in it is a different thing. In some ways, it feels like going a bit mad, or something - but that too is a kind of detox thing, as everything is being overhauled; emotionally, mentally, spiritually.

And I really have no idea where this is heading. At the moment it bothers me that I'm so skinny, even though I'm physically stronger than ever before. Checked my weight recently and I've just dipped beneath 10 stone, and being 6foot2, that's going to show. I look thin. If I continue like this, I'm going to eat cooked again, for fun, to gain weight etc.  But I have to remember, that when I was going vegan, and doing proper fasting, my weight also dipped, before going up again a little when I  continued on cooked vegan.

In some respects it doesn't bother me being so skinny -however, it bothers me when I feel like I have no idea where this is all going, when I'm in a position of doubt and so on.