Finally some peace....

I just wanted update my blog a little.

My path has always been two steps forward and one step back. If I look  back, I see I've come a long way at not being a total addict.

Sometimes I was eating a lot of raw food, then going back onto the bread, or coffee big time and so on.

Something has changed now though. It's been months since I've had bread. Coffee, too, I'm switching off without any sense of loss at all. I feel so much freer. I get through work without coffee! Now that is strange.

As I go forward, I'm happy to join in very occasionally. For example, next Saturday morning I'll have coffee and a vegan pain-au-chocolat. The rest of the week, just fruits and some carrot and almonds.

What I foresee, is that this too will slowly start to feel strange (or maybe not!), but for now I'm happy with it. I feel at peace, because I don't crave some of the things I used to...

No rules! Just going with the flow.

I know this blog had the word 'breatharianism' in it, but really, I don't know about that at all. That's just an idea, and I have no idea what it means. What does anything mean? :-))

The Test....

It's been a while since I've updated my blog.

The main thing really, is how I feel that every inch of my life is under inspection... No dark patch or emotion can be left... and also, my reactions to all things are being tested. Much inspiration from Buddhism and very brief contact I had with Buddhist monks. It is possible to go beyond desire and develop a deeply stable mind. Letting go, and in the process, seeing and receiving more, with always the desire to uplift the world in some way.

I wrote that wheat was a long struggle for me, but since last update, I've had no attraction to bread (June I think it was). I used to hit the bread like an addict (because I was an addict). I still drink coffee :-)) This is under review for me now too.

My food intake is really mostly fruits and carrots and celery, and almonds. I haven't felt better. If I feel like 'joining in', as it were, on a Saturday morning, I have a chocolate croissant, but my body reacts to that - not dramatically, but my body doesn't want this. I kind of enjoy that Saturday thing, but on the other hand, it also feels like eating slime or something... (I don't say that to anyone :-)) )

I feel like my body wants to reject  what I'm mostly eating - all that sweet fruit, and fibrous raw vegetables. It's weird, or perhaps normal, but I have bowl movements four or five times a day. I read that was healthy somewhere, I don't know. I just know that my body is eliminating stuff as quickly as possible, to get it out... The opposite, bowls stuck with unprocessed matter, is clearly a health risk. It seems to me, health isn't so much about what one eats, but more about what one doesn't.

Here's a thing I've learned for myself. Eliminating food stuffs isn't really to gain anything for this life, like amazing health or longevity (after all, we all die :-)) ). It's that everything we put into ourselves has a kind of resonance, a link to the whole process surrounding the food product. I feel freer without putting into myself all those energies...

I mentioned that I'm under inspection by something greater than me, and that continues to be true. It really is like a test. Often, I don't welcome it at all, and just wish I could be 'normal' and eat normally, But on the other hand, stagnation is not an option...

Weight still the same, 10 stone. Stopped running (my joints troubled by it). Keeping fit though, push ups etc.