I thought it was time to update my blog, to chart my progress. I've discovered that maintaining an account can be a useful and an interesting thing. Even if... the intellect is ultimately a rather futile tool when grasping the deeper wonders of our existence. I - or we - think one thing, believing a certain thing to be true or at least a plausible explanation for something, but in fact, it appears to me that intellectualisations of any kind, are only made-up structures that attempt to explain what is already there, or what has already happened. It appeals to the ego, really; some process that exists in time, and needs a map of some kind. But who knows why anything works, why anything exists at all; why humans appeared on earth, how it happened, and indeed, why humans evolved certain eating habits. It happened, and it happens....
Personally, apart from the above abstract, there's more personal stuff I'll detail, with regards to my change of diet. In some ways I've become even more orientated toward fruits, avoiding cooked food. And yet, foods which have been cooked in the past e.g. an oat biscuit, don't weigh as much on me as say, a freshly cooked bean stew. So I still go to some extent for pre-cooked oat based things; and yet, it's fresh fruits that really do it for me.
And yet... Often I feel like the things I'm eating, are equivalent to eating stones or metal. I use this analogy to describe how solid foods often feel to me - really extreme. Extreme inputing o substances... And yet, the hit I get from them, is amazing! When I observe myself eating, I can see that eating really is an imposition on the self, in some ways. Not a bad thing, but a sort of exaggeration of things, a thing learned from the ancestors. At this point in time, I see no real way out of it.
However, recently, I drank juices for breakfast and lunch, which suited me well, though I ate more later in the evening. I think what I need to do, is set aside a time for proper fasting. Not for the sake of 'not eating', but because, I experience the fact that when I'm empty of food, I feel things much more clearly. I'll do a day's fast soon, and see how I feel.